Beat the Dragon
Summary: Rodney hates to lose.
"You broke the rules and got caught, McKay. It's time to pay the price."
Rodney's shoulders slumped in utter defeat and he sullenly let John lead him out of the lab.
"How did you know? You always sleep like the dead after we've… And I was never away for more than an hour or two. What, did you rig the city to wake you up if anyone opened the door? I never realised you were quite that possessive."
"Rodney, you cheated. I'm not the one on trial here."
John pushed open the rec room door and quickly ushered him through, turning Rodney to face his fellow Atlanteans, his judge and jury.
"You got them all here, just for this? Colonel, that's a huge over-reaction, don't you think? It's not like I was trying to build a bomb or steal the chocolate rations. I was only trying to…"
"Yes, Rodney? Tell us, what exactly were you trying to do?"
Radek, Simpson, Ford, Teyla and Yamato all nodded, looking at Rodney to answer Carson's question.
"Dammit, John! I just want to beat the dragon, is that too much to ask? But every time I try, the bastard kills me! You won't show me how to do it and Ford just laughs every time I ask. The others say you've sworn them all to silence and that's so unfair. Honestly, Colonel, you're being rather juvenile about all this. I don't see why you're all acting this way, I really don't."
"We're gloating, Rodney. It's something you do well, if you remember. But you've probably never experienced it from the other side of the fence." Simpson grinned as Yamato provided a smattering of applause.
"Oh, please! If you've finished embarrassing me, I'll be going now. I still have a city to save from Kavanaugh's brainstorms, you know. It's not as if he can be trusted not to fiddle while I'm away. I'll, ah, see you all back here tonight and you can help me beat the dragon…"
"No, Rodney, you don't get to play any more. In fact," John looked at each jury member in turn, tallying up the nods and the one dissenting shaken head. "In fact, you don't get to play at all until we've finished it. Once we all know how to win, you'll have your shot at Kingdom Hearts 2. Maybe then I'll show you how to beat the dragon."